• How To Scare White People

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    Scaring white people is wrong. I do it—but it’s wrong.

    And when I say “scare” I don’t mean I hide in the bushes and jump out and say “boo!” Although hilarious, this isn’t what I would choose to spend my day doing. When I say “scaring” I mean simply by appearing at times. I live in a slowly gentrifying neighborhood in Brooklyn and I was walking down the street late one night and a young white woman who recently moved in was walking in front of me.

    Read rest of essay after video:

    She was obviously terrified because of the Negro apparently walking behind her for 2 blocks (we both got off of the train and we both lived at least 2 blocks in the same direction.) She turned around a few times very nervously and eventually stopped walking allowing me to walk in front of her so she could know where “I” was going.

    See? I wasn’t even TRYING.

    I thought about saying “Greetings random White lady. You may not know this but I’ve lived in this neighborhood for years and if anyone should be looking around nervously it should be me because anytime I see a young white woman in this area at 1am I’m terrified. Why? Because very soon my rent will be going up.” I didn’t say that because I didn’t want to be responsible for the young lady ruining a perfectly good pair of underwear but darn it I was really close to doing it.

    But I didn’t want to scare her. I don’t benefit from her being terrified. Hell I might have ended up with a can of mace in my eyes and a strong kick to the gut had I really scared that poor girl. This wouldn’t and isn’t the case for the Republicans and the Tea Party.

    They’re enjoying scaring the holy hell out of white people. Putting fear into their souls about losing a country that in all honesty was never Theirs (it was stolen and then handed down to them.) They’re profiting off of the fear of negroes and we aren’t even doing anything. When the young lady I was walking behind was scared at least I sort of understood–but the fear mongering that’s being ratcheted up by right wing news outlets is illogical. They’re throwing around the word “reparations.” Yeah, that thing that no one’s talking about BESIDES them.

    So if you’re confused as to why middle of the road white folks seem to be a bit antsy just watch an ep or 2 of Glenn Beck. Mystery solved.

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    Clueless Is The New Racist

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