Send your questions to Terrance: firstname.lastname@example.org
Dear Gay Best Friend,
This is what I’m going thru and what should I do?
My question is that of 2 parts. One is that after being in an 11 year relationship, and 10 years engaged, is it time to call it over?
Any time I bring up a wedding date once or 2 times a year we get into a big fight about it, and it never gets solved. What would you do?
And, the second part is that sex has gone to 1 time a year!! We haven’t had sex since March 9th 2010??? And we’re in May of 2010 go figure? But, I can drive her around all the time when she needs to go places. But, if I don’t feel like driving she blows a head gasket over it because she hates driving. But, she drives to work as well as I do 5 days a week.
Tell me what you think I should do – Want To Get Married
Dear Mr. Want To Get Married,
Uhm, well, damn, damn, damn, and shame on it all! You’ve been in an 11 year relationship, and 10 of those years engaged, what the “F” do you think you should do you big dummy? You have got to be the dumbest and most stupidest man walking on this side of the earth.
I mean come the “F” on! You’re engaged to a woman and every time you bring up the subject of setting a wedding date it results into a big fight? And, you’re sticking around. WOW! You’ve just given a new meaning to the definition of p***y whipped. And, you can’t be p****y whipped because she’s only giving it to you one time a year. HOT DAMN! It’s time be out that piece. Throw up the deuces and bounce!
WOW! WOW! WOW! I mean, really? Your girl isn’t breaking you off with no loving, sexing, or physical contact? You’re not even touching, or tasting it. I’m sorry, but I wouldn’t be sticking around waiting on anybody especially a 10 year engagement, and then on top of that no sex. Chile, puhlease. It ain’t that much right hand action in the world. I know you got blue balls.
And, who the hell is engaged for 10 years? Where they do that at? Please, lawd, let me contain myself because I just want to shake the –ish out of you and rattle your brain back in place.
Either you’re desperate, old, ugly, or mentally challenged. And, I’m gathering you’re probably all four. Ain’t no way in hell no woman wouldn’t want to get married and you’re going above and beyond for her. I’m taking a stab in the dark here and assuming that you’re faithful, and she still doesn’t want to marry you? Whew! I think you need to lay off the malt liquor, Newports, and wash your crusty ass.
But, thetruth.com is that she may have another man, or men, on the side and you’re the home piece she can rely on. And, if she is pimping you and the other men like that, she’s the true definition of a gangster. And, you’re her bottom b***h.
Look, Mr. Want To Get Married, she’s not going to marry you. She doesn’t love you, like you, or find you remotely attractive. She’s bilking you, taking your money, and using you. Why are you sticking around and waiting on someone who picks a fight with you about a marriage date, and you’ve already popped the question? You know what’s so unattractive about you other than that pot belly (I’m assuming you got one), and those crusty ashy feet, and musty balls, is a man who is whiny, spineless, and no backbone. She is running over you like those fake Manolo’s she’s pumping up and down the street in. Get you some self-esteem, cut that nasty ass beady hair off your chest and around your nuts, get into a gym and build some muscle tone, get a haircut and cut that damn curly tail, a pedicure and manicure, and trust and believe her tune will change about you. But, it will be too late. Move on, get into a church, ask for deliverance from her spirit and to loose the ties between you, and ask God to bring a woman into your life that will appreciate and love a man like you. So, when she asks you to take her someplace because she doesn’t want to drive, then you take her to the furthest Wal-Mart. I’m talking about way out where there is nothing around but a dust crop and no buses. Drop her ass off, and she hobbles her ass into the store, you pull off, leave her wanna-be gangsta self there, and go home, pack your –ish, and bounce. Don’t waste another day, minute, or hour. And, I’m giving you a pass to go and get yourself some good head and ass! – Straight From Your Gay Best Friend
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